14 Weeks, 3 Days...

101 days to go until my due date. Yikes.

As the due date approaches, my anxiety level raises. I think is probably normal. Though I had cooled on the idea of taking birthing classes (I am stubborn and like to do things my own way), I am now considering taking one just to feel more emotionally prepared.

I am on my 3 rd birth related book and though I think most of the information is sinking in, I do worry that I will get to birth and panic. Damon is a very strong, calm influence in my life and the perfect partner for me to have at our child's birth, but when I get myself tangled into a panic- I stop listening to him (or anyone else who might be trying to help me).

So, I am on to more books and possibly a short class to help me grasp the internal issues that are popping up.

I am anxiety prone and a bit of a control freak- additionally, I have come to not trust my body (perhaps through years of dieting?). Once again, I am being prompted to learn and grow, to trust my body in this process and believe in myself. I am constantly being reminded that everyone's pregnancy is different and I cannot keep comparing myself and berating myself for where I am, what I am feeling, or what I look like.

I really thought pregnancy was going to be a freaking walk in the park. HA!