Bad Budgeteer

As a child, I was a saver... I would save my allowance, save my baby sitting money, even in my late teens I saved fairly well. College was a time of living hand to mouth, a state I hope to never have to enter again.

My parents taught me very well about budgeting and debt, so perhaps I have an innate ability to see the dollars and cents logically.

Therefore, setting up a budget for our household has always been my job, and to be honest, I really like it... I get a lot of satisfaction from making numbers "work" and seeing debt balances go down. At least it is satisfying on paper...

Pregnancy has a lot in common with planning a wedding- All of a sudden you NEED things, and you do not care how much you spend on them. This Mamma is still pretty practical, but I can FEEL the pull of things I NEED before the baby gets here. Some of them I will bend to- and some I will simply have to get over.

Bad budgeteering is not the real problem- it is Bad Budget Stick-to-itiveness (BBS). I am prone to BBS when grocery shopping and I HAVE TO HAVE something not on my list- like skittles or 3 Home/Garden type magazines... BBS strikes often when Damon and I are at Target and he pipes up that he would really like "x." He does not ask for much and the occasional $20-$40 expense is not that big of a deal. Besides, he works hard and I don't give him much of an allowance. Of course, to counter his want-expenditure, I often get something I have wanted, last night it was new slip-on shoes.

BBS has been on the rise lately. My internal budget-meter is on the fritz and I want things when I want them. I think to myself "we have some padding, I can work it out." This is true, I CAN work it out- but the longer I let my budget slip, the longer it will take me to pay off our debt and the longer it will be before we get a new car.

I wonder if this is self-sabotage. I know it is going to be a while before we can get a newer car (something I really want) and perhaps I am feeling a bit defeated about it. Our tax return is lower than I expected, so that pushes our newer car out even further. Perhaps subconsciously I know the things I want are far away and it is making budget stick-to-itiveness very difficult. I don't want to tighten my belt, because the rewards seem far away.

I am not certain how to correct my BBS issues. We are not spending on ultra-frivolous things... Damon got a new bag for the computer and I got new shoes that do not lace-up... Soon, I want to get a new rug for our front room, I want to do some projects for the baby's room (a couple of sewing projects). I would LOVE to tile and repaint the bathroom, invest in a pedestal sink, repaint our bedroom, and retro-fit a full size platform for the our queen sized bed. These are all good, understandable things... Any homeowner/new parent wants their home to be as beautiful, clean, and safe as possible. The problem is finding room in our budget to do it... Do I slow down the debt pay off? Do I suck it up and deal with the things I find "ugly" in my house? Maybe I should start playing the lottery.

YUCK.